I'm extremely proud of both my older brothers (Paulo and Nikhil). They have achieved so much professionally, and while I joke that I'm the "poor relation", it is only in jest. I too have achieved a lot professionally, and I’m most excited about where the journey takes me next. And that’s a perfect segue into what I wanted to talk about.
I wanted to talk about this article about my eldest brother, Nikhil Eapen.
Zat Astha, has done so much research, asked interesting and different questions, and as a result has written an incredible article. This isn’t the usual CEO profile that talks about success and achievements, it focuses on the multi-generational journey that shaped Nikhil (and to a large extent all three of us Eapen siblings). While we all have reached various milestones, we’re very much still on our respective journeys and enjoying them.
One of my friends asked me a while ago what special sauce our parents gave us, to turn out three children that not only have done so well, but are fundamentally good and kind people. I wasn’t able to answer it at the time, but Nikhil says it perfectly here: “They raised us with strong values and high expectations, but they didn’t micromanage. It was understood, almost unspoken, that you were expected to achieve and create something on top of what your parents had given you.”
Educational achievement was seen as the norm. Both my mother and maternal grandmother were university educated, and the three of us knew that getting an undergraduate degree from a good university was a given. Professionally, we knew we would all be able to stand on our own two feet right after university, and so we did.
That was professionally and academically, but most importantly they were strong role models as people. They always treated people with respect and kindness, and growing up in a poor country as a family with a certain level of comfort and wealth, that wasn’t the norm around us. They didn’t take short-cuts, and consistently acted within their value system and did the right thing. Even if it was the hard thing.
And then life happens (as so eloquently put by the Nurture Network at one of panels at their It Takes a Village gathering), with our father dying when Nikhil was 23, Paulo 19, and me 15. I had a lot of life happen as a teenager. Less than three years later, Nikhil, my mother and I were evacuated from Indonesia during the riots, so I couldn’t finish high school. Then while we were in Singapore, one of my close friends died suddenly. A few weeks later, I was flying to a new country (the US) to a university where I knew nobody. So yeah, I developed a lot of resilience.
But more importantly, through all this I had my village. I have an incredible and supportive family, but I also have shared paths with other special people that mean that my village keeps growing as I get older. Whether they are next door, or on a different continent, I know they have me, and I have them. And those aren’t just words, we have flown across continents to pick each other up when we have broken. You all know who you are.
All of that helped me get through the most difficult period of my life to date. My first son was delivered at 29 weeks, because I was life threateningly ill. I don’t know how my husband coped knowing that there was a chance that neither of us would come through (we did, and are both thriving), but I know a large part of it was our village who was with us, day in, day out.
So when Greensill happened, it was very very hard, but I was confident I had the resilience and the support to get through it. Because I’ve got through much harder.
I roll my eyes when my brothers try to give me lessons, as any good little sister should. But they both know that I appreciate, love, and need them. And as I said at Paulo’s wedding anniversary recently, he is always there for me.
I know I should be turning this around to how Risk Strategy Consulting or Para Dewa can help you, but this week’s post is purely a personal one. I’m just happy to be on this weird journey of risk advisory and wine with people I love.
Comments